Submission Guidelines

This thing—this website you’re reading—is usually a two-man show. We write and edit our work, and then we throw it at the wall and see if it sticks. People maybe read it, we’re not sure. But listen: it’s gotten pretty lonely around here. We want to “publish” your work, too. That would make things a lot more exciting. That way you get to find a home for your writing or art or whatever, and we get to feel a little less lonely. Doesn’t that sound wonderful? Please look over the guidelines (term used lightly) below and figure out what you want to do.

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We accept prose, essays, stories, insane ramblings, meditations, discourses, treatises, exegeses, philosophical breakthroughs, captains’ logs—and so on. Any lovingly-crafted literary work is welcome. There is no length restriction, no code of format, no preferred subject matter—you are free to create any damn thing in the whole world. Still, it would be wise to “acquaint” yourself with the material we have already published. To wit: read up some and figure out what we tend to look for.

And before you even think about submitting something, please consult famous American novelist Elmore Leonard’s “Ten Rules of Writing”. If you begin your piece with the weather, or, worse—overuse adverbs—you’re going to make two grown men cry.

That being said: Your work may need to be edited. If the editing entails more than correcting typos, we will, of course, let you know—and send you the edited draft for your approval before posting. Some works with potential may need editing on a more fundamental level. If we still really want it, we’ll send you suggestions, and you can either say, “Sure, that sounds great!” or get bitter and dash off into the sunset with your manuscript.

Send all submissions to this address: submissions@viiinothing.com. Please include your name (pseudonymous or otherwise), story title and a brief (four-to-five sentence) author bio. We will confirm that we have received your submission and probably say something sad and desperate.